Emo baby has arrived...and he's gonna wanna crawl right back in when he figures out his name.
NME has reported that Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson had a healthy, bouncy baby boy last night...that they proudly named Bronx Mowgli Wentz.
BRONX MOWGLI? He's probably already on his way to his lawyer's office to file for emancipation from his parents.
BRONX MOWGLI? First of all, his initials are BMW! Trust me. That wasn't a coincidence. They just want a free car. Second of all, his short initials are BM. Enough said.
A spokesperson told NME, "Ashlee, Pete and baby Bronx are all healthy and happy, and thank everyone for their well wishes!"
Correction: BMW is not happy. Ass and Pete may think he's crying, because he's a little baby, but that's not the case. He's crying because his name is BMW and he already hates life!!! With a name like BMW, he can either be a low-rent neighborhood rapper or a low-rent neighborhood DJ.
Somewhere in the world, Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale (aww. SMUSH SMUSH SMUSH.) has stopped crying over his name and is finally smiling, because someone has an even fuglier name than him.
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